Well, you've asked for honest critique, so here goes.
It's fabulous Delph. No changes are necessary. I had ease reading this first time off and found no stumbling blocks or rythyms that needed tapped out. It flows magnificently and would lend itself well to performance by an actor / actress with access to a good microphone and preferably a minidisc recorder with USB and conversion to mp3 software.
True to a lot of your work, it also captures imagery like a high-end digital photo or short film. There are ambiences and shifts of light a-plenty at work in this poem.
Again, although at a technical level a tad difficult, this could be scripted to screenplay. I for one am/was there, a silent or off-screen witness. I felt his pain relieved with the spliffs. I know this feeling. I felt time lapsing between smokes and as a result felt the atmosphere and the friendship between you both...
Suggesting a name for this work might be quite a novel way of popularising it as well. May I suggest something like; 'Just A Spliff' or Healing Herbs? Obvious ones I know, but for me, they fit...
Nice one Delph. This would definitely work well with the Healing Herbs film. I would be honoured if you let us include it mate.
As for Argie's poem. I think perhaps he meant THC instead of TCP... Easy error to make considering English isn't his native tongue.
Cheers
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